Christ, when did I become this?

This is me as a kid...(or is it me now?). 

This is me when I was really upset about how you guys wouldn't leave Britney Spears alone, you bastards. 

This is me when my ungrateful brat kid kept using wire hangers.

This is me at wits end because they were tearing me apart!

...but this is my crowing glory (you may not recognize me; makeup):