You hear about these Hollywood types who are married for a few months, a few years maybe, and then they're splitting up.  A week later they're out on the town with a new partner.  Really?  A little quiet time maybe? A little self reflection, perhaps?

After Jejune it took me over a year to try it again.  I couldn't change her, that was done, but what could I do differently?  What did I do to turn it sour?  A lot it turned out; It was a bad match, pure and simple.  We never were aligned in what we wanted, I only knew what I wanted and held her, erroneously, to that.  I assumed the premise.  (Still, she was a cold-assed bitch through-and-through.)

After the teacher, it took another two years before trying it again.  She was too young (emotionally) and ill-equipped to handle me; I was attracted to her naiveness, but in the end it was just a dangerous stupidity. 

Then there was the psychopathic narcissist.   This one was intense.  Truth is, I think labels like 'psychopath' and 'narcissism' are a bit much, but one night last year some guy kept talking about some 'narcissist' until I interrupted with my protest over such labels.  He sent me some links to read and fricking chills went down my spine.  It was spot on.  And for years I thought I was just going crazy. 

But something broke in me, I never got up again after that one. 

It's been years, and I can't shake it.